It’s funny how you can look at someone’s life and think they have it all together or say to yourself, “they are so lucky, I wish I could do what they do” “If only I had money.” etc etc etc. Well that was me only a couple months ago. Every month I was down to the wire, not knowing when or how I could pay the next bill and completely anxious that my account would overdraft.
What was most frustrating to me was that it wasn’t because I wasn’t getting work, it was that brands were just not paying me on time. In fact they were paying MONTHS late, so it was as if I wasn’t getting paid at all and it really hurt me. It hurt that I was working so hard to do this job full time and every time I was met with a challenge. I just wanted for once for it to just be a little easier. I mean I already worked so hard, could I at least see the reward from it and not have to pay my car note half at a time cause I couldn’t afford the whole thing at once!
Now I’m definitely a person of faith and I believe int he power of prayer but somewhere along the line I lost my way. My boyfriend would always watch sermons every morning and I would be in and out. I always made sure to watch on Sundays but as much as I believed what was being said, I was having a really hard time practicing it fully.
Until one specific day….
My sister was visiting me in LA from back home and the Sunday before she left we decided to go to church. My favorite church in LA is The Potters House at One Church. Without fail I always leave there feeling motivated and inspired. So when my sister came into town I knew I wanted to take her there. The sermon that day was all about taking risk and having faith enough to trust in God to catch you. The point I loved was that when you are taking a risk on something in your heart, it is actually not a risk at all. You are doing what is called and it will all fall into place. As moving as the sermon was, the main part that stuck out to me was the call to tithe.
My parents left the church when I was young and I would always go with just my sister when we were young teens but the concept of tithe was lost on me. I would always give offering but tithe is different. It’s 10% of your earnings donated to the church. It’s a way to give back from the blessings God has given you. I’m not going to lie, I never felt moved to do this. In fact I never was in a financially stable enough place to consider adding something new to spend my money on (at least that’s how I saw it at the time) But my whole perspective changed that day and every time I think about it I want to cry.
At this point, I still wasn’t getting paid by anyone and I barely had any money in my account but I decided to tithe. I didn’t tithe 10% of what I was making cause technically that was zero. I tithed 10% of what I WANTED to make each week. And here’s the freaky part. I kid you not, the week I decided to tithe I got paid immediately by a brand. I completed the work and they paid me SAME DAY. This never ever happens. And guess what?! It was exactly the amount that made my 10% tithe make sense. My mind was honestly blown.
Once that happened the flood gates opened and all my back payments started to come in. I honestly couldn’t believe it. I didn’t tithe so I could receive money, I tithed because Once Church has been such a blessing on my life and has really helped strengthened my faith and my love for the Word. It was my thank you to God for such a blessed place.
I don’t share this story to tell you that you need to tithe or go to church. I’m telling it because when I look back merely 3 months ago, when I had nothing, to now, my heart is so full it could burst. And the only difference was my faith in God. The moment I was all in, my life completely changed for the better. The fact that I can work for myself, travel the world, meet new people and loveeee Mondays, because that means my emails start to fill up again, is a BLESSING!!
As you read before, I didn’t come to London just to “play” it was a step I felt I needed to do to as a leap of faith. My financials were coming together but I wanted my life to be more then that. I wanted to love myself unapologetically, I want to be surround by people who love me and who I love and who make me better. I want to get married in the near future and start a family…and taking care of myself was the first step. I wanted to be a better girlfriend and eventually wife and mother. I don’t believe you can take care of others if you can’t even take care of yourself.
And so I leapt here. I’ve been meeting friends and exploring but what I’m not showing is the many days I sit in my apartment reading the word, meditating, and focusing on what I want out of life. Here’s the kicker, as soon as I made the decision to come to London, to take a “risk,” I got two big jobs that essentially paid for this trip to happen. This is not coincidence my friends. Decide, and then let God do the rest.
All this to say. The life you want to live is just a “risk” of faith away. Dare to have faith in yourself, dare to know that God will give you wings if choose to fly. Pastor Toure once said, “The opposite of faith is not doubt, it’s sight.” Because we can not see it, we don’t allow it to happen.
So even if you don’t see it in front of you, I hope you try your best to believe whatever you want out of this life is possible. I obviously don’t have all the answers and I know this is just the beginning for me on a marvelous journey. My excitement level is on 10 for my life because I chose to live it and I chose to fly. And the next time you look at someone else’s life in envy, ask yourself what are you doing to better your life? Have you taken a leap?
Look around less, imagine more, and watch your life flourish.
Thank you for joining me in this journey. It’s only the beginning and I can’t wait for what’s to come.